They tell me if I am ok. I'd noticed a strange smell coming from his body yesterday. It was like being hit with a mallet I was confused for months.

Life is going on around me and I see it, but it’s as though I’m at a distance, separated by this grief I can’t shake. Just seeing family 2 to 3 times a year makes life very lonely.. i slways wish someone would call to check up on me to see how I’m doing. I wished I could have had option B or C. (B. he lived 5-10 years longer and C. We grew old together in our 70’s-80’s.

He knew. What can I do for you. I realize God has a plan but I don’t understand it.I feel the same way.

I can pray for comfort and peace but that won’t bring him back. I molded my life around caring for this stubborn man, who wouldn't admit that he passed out dozens of times a day from chronic low blood pressure.

Retirement has become a time of new priorities and interests. Everyone says time, but time seems a long way off!!! !I have one daughter and one grandson.

I am so sorry even two people have to experience this.That’s what everyone says. i keep hoping i will wake up and realize it was just a nightmare.

I cried many times as I read through them. Put it in a cage and added to it with my gratitude list, my decorating pages, my decluttering, my conscious decision to take a mental vacation and live in the land of hope, joy, gratitude, laughter, creativity, organization, and beauty.I've taken a fleeting moment and expanded it into an hour, and now a morning and soon 'a good day'. Use the love you have been given and give Death a kick in the ass by paying it forward to those who need the help now….in this life…while you can. AND read this approach, also:I was driving home today after a a busy day of meeting, movie, then shopping. I was married for only 8 years and at 32 u was a widow raising our 3 year old son alone. I want to see him again more than anything and I truly do not want to go on. When he died, our story died with it. Nothing stays the same. However, I am no longer feeling his presence. I no longer felt valued and I cried a lot.

I'd kept him alive through shear will power. )6 weeks ago my wife left and everything you say, is exactly how I feel…..Please delete this one above – I meant to respond to Edward, below.I feel horrible lost now live in a empty house that used to be our home miss my wife so badly she passed away from aggressive lung cancer suddenly two days after she came home from hospital on July 30th 2018 got up at 4amnoticed her breathing was raspy tried waking her to see if she wanted a glass of water when she did not respond I call 911 they took her to emergency room where she awoke I was holding her hand she looked into my eyes and then gone I never slept right since and wont sleep in the bedroom anymore just in the recliner I always look to see if she’s with me in the store or when I get home from work or anyplace no one there to ask how my day was or hug kiss or talk to I havent had any visitors in 8 months straight somtimes wonder if I should just move away but both of us made the house the way it is together it’s hard i wish i could be with her again 6 weeks ago my wife left and everything you say, is exactly how I feel…..I feel all of the above comments.

Everything in our house (which is a mess) is not touched or moved. Life has lost its joy. So stick around and see how it all turns out!I lost my husband April 7 2019 the loneliness and quietness is killing me ! The hospital would call and ask me about his body.so his family all donated mony and got him crematef.he left me with 800 in cash a closed checkbook.i understand he did not pay the insurace.I experienced loss of friends ,not invited anymore I ‘m now single not by choice and it sucks .People can suck sometimes . I sometimes still call home when and leave a short message for her when I am out, even, though she is not there, I leave a message for her on the answering machine…….just to hear her name mentioned when I listen to my messages when I get home.Thank you Sandra…….My Georgette was so very close to God and prayed allways, and now I think I am riding relying on her her prayers as I always have always throughout our marriage.I am still praying one prayer,”God be merciful to me a sinner.” The only prayer that I can muster these days……along with Georgette please pray for me.I so get it. She could walk short distances, and would hold on to my arm as we walked so she wouldn’t fall. I have lost at least 10 family members and know that better than anyone that it never leaves you. So stick to that schedule, girl. My full time job now has to be taking care of myself. I can’t watch baseball anymore. I ask his opinion on things and seem to hear in my heart his replies. I wish I was 92.Hi Beverly, I feel similar to you.